How to Connect your Story with Readers
All of us live with emotions and feelings, though some of us may feel more deeply than others, no human gets through life without them. These feelings are what will connect your reader to your story. They want your words to awaken or sharpen their emotions, they want to feel they share a piece of the experience your characters are having--good or bad.
It is vital as an author to identify the emotions that will fuel the story, thus creating that magical connection with readers who often see parts of themselves within your cast of characters, someone they can empathize with, or aspire to be like. Make them multi-dimensional by giving them flaws, strengths, and relatable motivations. Readers are more likely to connect with characters who feel real and human.
How important is the plot then, really?
I would argue that you could have the greatest plot outlined, but without strong characters to bring it to life, you've got nothing. In my personal writing journey I know I focused more heavily on crafting my plot initially, but after getting further into my story I realized the plot was of secondary importance. How my characters felt about what was happening was the most engaging.
Does the plot drive the characters or do the characters drive the plot?
As an author, that's going to be up to you to decide, and it might be a mix of both. The funny thing that's happened to me as I am almost finished with my first draft is that I find sometimes my characters are behaving in ways I didn't expect. I may have planned out how I thought they would react, but when I'm in the midst of writing and really seeing myself in their shoes, the words that come out of their mouths are sometimes unexpected--because they're based on feelings, not some mechanical writing guide.
To be a writer, or any creative person, you must retain your ability to react uniquely. This is what will make your voice and work original. This is what will help you connect your story to readers' real feelings and emotions.
Video: How to Write a Character Arc
A note on being a perfectionist
My perfectionist tendencies started in childhood. When I think back to my school-aged years, I remember wanting to get perfect papers (spelling tests, math quizzes, etc.) and that I couldn't seem to blow off mistakes or missed questions as easily as my peers. I lived for the praise of my teachers about how neat my handwriting was, or what reading level I had achieved, or how many points I had accumulated for certain scored tasks.
I can recall a very specific day in fourth grade. I was sitting in the classroom in my little brown desk, when my teacher passed back a test that we'd had. On it, we'd been asked to weave our way through a fictional town map, following his verbal directions of north, south, east, and west. I had reversed east and west, and therefore my route was incorrect. I got an F---the only one I would ever receive in my life.
When I saw the score on the paper the shame burned through me from head to toe. In that moment I knew I never wanted to feel like that again. What I don't recall is if I had studied for that test, but I do know I studied for every test that I ever had in the future. It's sad to think about how long I carried that moment with me, as I'm sure my teacher didn't realize the impact that one grade would have on me.
I used to view being a perfectionist as a positive personality trait. After all, it pushed me to succeed academically and personally, and isn't a good thing to be motivated? I think it can be a good motivator, but not to the extent that I took it. I needed to realize that things don't have to be so perfect, because even when things were going according to my plan, I wasn't 100 percent happy. The worry that I would fail to meet my expectations was ruining a lot the joy I should have felt along the way. My perfectionism tended to be self-critical. There are other types of perfectionism which may include having high expectations of others, rather than yourself, which can lead to conflict and relationship problems.
Now that I am putting myself out there in the literary world, it's easy to fall back into my old self-critical ways, but I am actively monitoring my responses to my work. I know my book won't be for everyone, much like a certain recipe or music won't be liked by all. I'm focusing on writing the best book that I can write, and knowing there will be criticism as it goes out into the world.
If there's something in your life that you are working towards, I encourage you to praise yourself for the effort you are putting forth, rather than the outcome. Of course it's great if you have effort that equals the result you wanted, but on the chance that things don't turn out quite like you expected, I hope you can say you learned something along the way.
